I’m sure no matter what your rock bottom may look like, it would feel similar to my rock bottom. Rockbottom is a nasty place you find yourself at, quite unexpectedly and pretty inevitably.
So now that we’re familiar with the concept, let’s look at the 5 steps I have curated to help anyone who is willing to surface out of rock bottom.
1. Feel the burn
A lot of our bad experiences get registered as bad memories in our brains and later reify themselves as unwanted behaviour patterns. So it always works in our favour if we live through our pain instead of concealing it. One of my favourite analogies, though a bit exaggerated, to live through the bad experiences is this scene from the movie ‘Fight Club’. Tyler forces Jack to ‘stay with the pain and not to block it out’. It’s liberating to accept pain and grieve for what is lost! So find what works for your process of grieving, let it all out, and feel the weight lifting off your chest. Since it’s only after you have grieved enough, that the rock bottom loses all power over you.
2. Call A Spade A Spade
It’s natural to exaggerate our sufferings and get delusional about our predicament. Unnecessary blame (either on self, on others or on luck), repeated negative self-talk, extrapolating one bad event to become about one’s entire life, and so on. We all see so many people doing these things and scorn them. However, when we hit rock bottom, we unwillingly do those same things and intensify the quandary. I have realised that calling a spade a spade really helps. State the situation just as it is eg. “I’ve lost my job”, “I’ve broken up with the love of my life”, “I’ve no friends left in my life”, “I’m not finding the right partner/job/house”, so on and so forth. Refrain from amplifying it like “I’ve lost my job, my career is ruined and I will never achieve success”, “I’ve broken up with the love of my life, I will never find love again and will probably die single”, “I’ve no friends left in my life, I am not good enough for anyone, nobody likes me and I hate everyone”, etc. This will really help in knowing the definite problem!
3. Find Your Balance